true_bohra wrote:@ starwars:
it is not a brilliant idea at all. I have already mentioned about Quran stating on Iddat.
And it is all fabricated things that women should not look at sky and read newspaper and all. Women is allowed to do anything she want. The only things she is restricted to is that no men should see her and hear her voice.
Fish aquarium and all things is bull shit. She can see all men but no gair mehroom men should see her. Shariat e Mohammediyah is far flexible than what we think.
Thanks True Bohra bhai, even i though that these rules were some major bullshit, but since i am not as well-versed as you are, i kept quiet that maybe i was unaware
Fish aqauriam was completely bizarre. i wonder where that came from
Not to belabor the issue : but I am aware of the following facts from personal experiences for women in iddat in my family and and close friends. You got to understand and keep in mind the context of "what you can or cannot do" varies so much from one Jamaat or community to another , from one set of families to another, from who is amil's bensaheb in what location at what time.
There is a lot of variation I have observed in "what you can and cannot do" - because a lot of it is arbitrary, and the experience and consensus among some people is that the more you ask about the details "of what you can or cannot do",the worse the restrictions get.!
Yes there are instances that I can easily vouch for:
No opening window for fresh air (even when privacy is not an issue)
Fish aquarium -
Cannot converse on telephone
Cannot hear a mehramdaar woman or man on phone
No photo of non-mehramdaar, husband, aqa maula - depends who you ask - varies.
There are a lot of variations in what people say yu can or cannot do. So my observation and conclusion has been that in he last 5-10 years, the "OFFICIAL" rules (which btw vary a lot- depending on who you ask) have got more restrictive, as a result most people (who are courageous and have immediate family support) do the bare minimum, or some just don't observe iddat anymore.
And my guess is that Dawat is aware of this and therefore the Birth of the Iddat House upon the death of the husband came into being.
It is likely to help a few folks with some viable options.
Nevertheless, the Iddat House is an example of dressing up an inordinately oppressive practice of iddat in the first place.