Bohra SMS Duniya

The one and only free public forum for Bohras. The focus of this forum is the reform movement, the Dawoodi Bohra faith and, of course, the corrupt priesthood. But the discussion is in no way restricted to the Bohras alone.
Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#151

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:05 pm

think,

you are committing azeem gunaah by asking such intelligent questions. don't you know that one of the foremost qualifications to be a rabid abde, is to be stupid and brainless and have the infinite capacity to swallow crap?

please immediately do a reverse sajda and send in a fakhir najwa into hazrate aaliyah imamiyah qudsaniya burhaniyah wal muffadaliya.

repent you sinner!!

Safiuddin
Posts: 546
Joined: Sat Jul 28, 2007 4:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#152

Unread post by Safiuddin » Mon Jan 07, 2013 2:40 pm

Well, if phook nu paani is so precious, why not disseminate it across the globe?
Why, innumerable diseases could be cured by just a drop of this elixir of the Gods.
Burhannuddin, Inc. could market and sell this new wonder cure all over the world.
Imagine, yet another source of unlimited revenue.

And so simple too; Muff Addled could go to the source of the Ganges and blow shifaa on it - then all of India would be saved.
1 drop of shifaa paani added to the Atlantic Ocean could cure so many poor, suffering people. Gosh,
i can't wait to wash my feet in the ocean.

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#153

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Jan 07, 2013 4:44 pm

Safiuddin wrote:Burhannuddin, Inc. could market and sell this new wonder cure all over the world.
Then again there will be an internal war in saifee mahal and all the 3 groups will fight over "Patent Rights". :mrgreen:

Maqbool
Posts: 844
Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 4:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#154

Unread post by Maqbool » Mon Jan 07, 2013 9:12 pm

mufaddal mola ye farmayu k jao bhai pani ni botal lai avo, ye bhai botal laya, mufaddal mola ye pani par shifa boli, ane bhai ne puchu ke aa pani senu che?
to ye kahe che mola shifa nu che, to mola farmave che shifa nu kem kehvai a pani to tamaru che??
tame laya, paisa tamara hata, pachi shifa nu kem kehvai. ye bhai samjhi gaya ane mola naa qadam per giri gya ane mafi mangi, moula ye shifa aapi.
In this story a hidden moziza pan zaher thaya!
Moula ye bottle ma fook mari pan badha gam na dabba ma to khandala ma betha beth phook mare che ane shifa bole che!

asad
Posts: 777
Joined: Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:54 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#155

Unread post by asad » Tue Jan 08, 2013 5:13 am

Venue: Indore near fakhri building Incident :
Ek dikra cycle par thaali nu Jaman laine jai rahya hata itna ma ek car wala Ehna si takraayu ghani zor si accident ni aawaaz aawi
Dikro car si takraaine road par giri gayo cycle naa PaAchal nu tyre wali gayu thaali na dabba neeche giri Gaya
Thaali ni Barakat si em mojizo zaahir thayu ke itna mohta accident thawa baad dikra Zara bhi injured thaya nahi Ane dabba ma Jaman bhi salaamat hatu
KHUDA AQUA MAULA tus ANE AAPNA MANSOOS MAULAYA MUFADDAL tus ni UMAR SHARIF NE QAYAMAT NA DIN LAG DARAAZ KARJO
AAMEEN
Plz forward to all mumeneen.

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#156

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Tue Jan 08, 2013 7:55 am

considering the miraculous protective properties of the dabba, the indian military has decided to order a million dabbas as an initial order, so that these dabbas can be hung around the necks and chests of our soldiers. they will now be invincible from enemy bullets, bombs, missiles and tanks.

badrijanab
Posts: 809
Joined: Fri Jun 15, 2012 3:19 pm

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#157

Unread post by badrijanab » Tue Jan 08, 2013 8:27 am

Al Zulfiqar wrote:considering the miraculous protective properties of the dabba, the indian military has decided to order a million dabbas as an initial order, so that these dabbas can be hung around the necks and chests of our soldiers. they will now be invincible from enemy bullets, bombs, missiles and tanks.
:D :D :D

Bohra spring
Posts: 1302
Joined: Mon Sep 17, 2012 8:37 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#158

Unread post by Bohra spring » Tue Jan 08, 2013 12:54 pm

AZ what if we change traffic rules

No need to have bike helmet

Carry a tifin for safety

Tufin at the rear can act as bumper so tire is also protected

clarify tifin food was shaken not stirred

Chinese manufacturers and Apple are interest in investment and rights

iTifin

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#159

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Tue Jan 08, 2013 5:34 pm

while all this was going on, the US defense forces heard about the amazing and miraculous properties of the abde ke dabbe and the indian military's quick response. not one to remain behind and sit on the sidelines, they have sent in a crack defense research team to test these protective properties.

meanwhile, india's biggest rivals, pakistan and china are rushing in to secure their rights to this dabba/thali technology. it seems that with this miraculous dabba scheme, saifee mahal will soon be minting money in billions, if not trillions. this could be a saving grace for ordinary abdes as the greedy mullas and zaadas will not bother them with stupid ziyafats, mafsuhiyats, hadiyats, paglas etc anymore. their salam amounts will now be considered pigeon feed compared to the defense contracts and they will be spared. phew! what a relief..!!

i hear that the wily zaadas are preparing to sell this dabba mojiza by adding a condition that the recipient has to undergo a bohra khatna for a male soldier and female khafz for women soldiers as a combo package. the next step will be to set up massive kitchens along the lines of airline catering kitchens. i learn that saifee mahal is already in talks with emirates abela dubai airport catering to set up this gigantic facility, which could turn out upto 35,000 dabba meals per shift, i.e. 105,000 dabbas per 24 hours.

quid johnny is rushing in to set up a thali dabba manufacturing plant and tying up the raw material supply by acquiring hind aluminium co. (hindalco), dubai aluminium (dubal) and alba (aluminium bahrain). chuster is buying up vegetable farms in panvel, ratnagiri, pune, nasik and nagpur areas, while idris is investing heavily in slaughterhouses to secure meat supply.

mazun is in talks with venky's, india's largest poultry supplier, to set up a JV and establish new hatcheries on 10,000 acres.

if any of you have any of these dabbas, hang onto them. they will soon be worth their weight in platinum!!


Maqbool
Posts: 844
Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 4:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#160

Unread post by Maqbool » Tue Jan 08, 2013 9:30 pm

Insted of spending lots of money on military, only dabba should be placed on the border. Barakat will make its magic and ......

Bohra spring
Posts: 1302
Joined: Mon Sep 17, 2012 8:37 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#161

Unread post by Bohra spring » Tue Jan 08, 2013 10:41 pm

Maqbool wrote:Insted of spending lots of money on military, only dabba should be placed on the border. Barakat will make its magic and ......
Maqbool what are you saying don't spoil the plan

Each daba by the time Az is through will be worth a small air craft carrier

The zada plan was once the govts realize the power they will double the budget automatically

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#162

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Wed Jan 09, 2013 3:57 pm

now even hospitals are flocking to place orders for the abde ka dabba, also known by its fancy term - faize mawaid. just by placing one thali dabba besides the patient's bed will guarantee that patient will recover miraculously even from the most malignant cancers, heart attacks, HIV aids, the most horrific injuries, bullet and stab wounds etc.

in fact the high level govt judicial enquiry into the gang rape incident of delhi has apparently questioned why a bohra dabba blessed by mansoos muffy was not immediately dispatched to feed that poor girl, victim of such atrocities. initially she was conscious and active, if she had been fed even one morsel from this magic dabba, she would have survived and would have arisen like jhansi ki rani on her horse and slaughtered those rapist tormentors of hers. she was a valiant fighter but alas, muffy had no compassion for her, neither did his faize mawaid committee.

it also appears that those bohra businessmen who take this dabba to work, are prospering in their businesses and their competitors, many of then non-bohras, are struggling and going downhill.

i have hindu, parsee and sikh friends who are also clamouring for our dabbas. i am thinking of getting a dabba franchise to buy into this frenzy and become a billionaire overnight, even if it means purchasing a shaikh title with 12 valves added.

hsnhussain
Posts: 82
Joined: Tue May 26, 2009 7:36 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#163

Unread post by hsnhussain » Thu Jan 10, 2013 9:15 am

Aali Qadr Maula TUS:
Ratlam Rajkot Jasdan Botad Limdi Lakhtar
Wankaner Jamnagar, Inshaallah...
Mumbai Central to Ratlam 11 jan 13 in 12903 golden temple.
Ratlam to Rajkot 15 jan 13 in 11466 somnath express
Jamnagar to mumbai 19 jan 13 in 19006 Saurashtra mail..

KhalifatulRahman
Posts: 142
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2012 4:53 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#164

Unread post by KhalifatulRahman » Thu Jan 10, 2013 11:11 am

Al Zulfiqar wrote:now even hospitals are flocking to place orders for the abde ka dabba, also known by its fancy term - faize mawaid. just by placing one thali dabba besides the patient's bed will guarantee that patient will recover miraculously even from the most malignant cancers, heart attacks, HIV aids, the most horrific injuries, bullet and stab wounds etc.

in fact the high level govt judicial enquiry into the gang rape incident of delhi has apparently questioned why a bohra dabba blessed by mansoos muffy was not immediately dispatched to feed that poor girl, victim of such atrocities. initially she was conscious and active, if she had been fed even one morsel from this magic dabba, she would have survived and would have arisen like jhansi ki rani on her horse and slaughtered those rapist tormentors of hers. she was a valiant fighter but alas, muffy had no compassion for her, neither did his faize mawaid committee.
it also appears that those bohra businessmen who take this dabba to work, are prospering in their businesses and their competitors, many of then non-bohras, are struggling and going downhill.

i have hindu, parsee and sikh friends who are also clamouring for our dabbas. i am thinking of getting a dabba franchise to buy into this frenzy and become a billionaire overnight, even if it means purchasing a shaikh title with 12 valves added.
i think u are transgressing limits with ur joking attitude, u shud have keep that poor girl out of this joke....

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#165

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Thu Jan 10, 2013 1:49 pm

i agree. my apologies.

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#166

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Sat Jan 19, 2013 1:04 pm

any sms re: a miraculous thali dabba having been dispatched to the bedside of mola in saifee hospital?

KhalifatulRahman
Posts: 142
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2012 4:53 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#167

Unread post by KhalifatulRahman » Sun Jan 20, 2013 1:47 am

season of miracles are over now....

asad
Posts: 777
Joined: Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:54 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#168

Unread post by asad » Wed Jan 23, 2013 2:09 am

Instructions on not to post anything on Forums coming from Vazarat
Instructions on not to post anything on Forums coming from Vazarat

asad
Posts: 777
Joined: Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:54 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#169

Unread post by asad » Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:42 am

Image

asad
Posts: 777
Joined: Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:54 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#170

Unread post by asad » Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:46 am

and before Mufaddal saheb becomes Dai, mojizas and stories of 54th have started pouring in

Bani Saify gaam ma ek shakhs che Ali Raashid, bilkul Qaat ukharwaane tayyar nai, banduk lai ne aawe ane eim kahe ke mara paase 10 bachao che, aa lo banduk ane qatal kari lo me ek paiso nai maangu, magar mara qaat na jhaar ne haath na lagaujo, khidmat guzaro ehna c bilkul na umeed thai gaya tha ke aa bhai to nayyaj maane ane ehna c behes karwanu muki didu thu. Gai kaale ittefaq c taha bs saifuddin ye ek khidmat guzar ne fone kido bani saify ma ane Ali Raashid wahaj hato, wo khidmat guzar ye taha bs ne araz kidi ke aa bhai aam kahe che, taha bs ye farmayu ehne fone aapo ane taha bs ye farmayu ke bhai qaat ukharo ek patto b baqi na rahe, ali rashid itno khush thai gayo ane fone par kehwa lago ya sayedi aap mola na farzand chho, aap kaho cho to qaat su me puri mitti, puro pahaar ukhari naakhis, ane fone mukwa baad matha par haath mari mari ne pura gaam ma kahe me taha bs c waat kidi, ane pura qaat ukharwane tayyar thai gayo. Khuda ta'ala Taha bs saifuddin ni Sa'i mashkur karjo ane bewe mola ni aankh ne aap ma thandi karjo, ane bewe mola ni umar shareef daraz karjo.

Safiuddin
Posts: 546
Joined: Sat Jul 28, 2007 4:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#171

Unread post by Safiuddin » Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:35 am

Asad, tame bhooli gaya? Aaj na din baad, Muffy Mola Ali Rashid no wepaar na paisa
khud apni mubarak jaib si nikali nay aapse.
Ajab shaan aap ni che!
Ajab daawat aapni che!
Ajab milkat aapni che!

Naara - e Takbeer!

KhalifatulRahman
Posts: 142
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2012 4:53 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#172

Unread post by KhalifatulRahman » Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:53 am

^ btw why are they joinig hands in pics? are they sorry for some thing?

or are they just requesting abdes to just give away money without any questions?

KhalifatulRahman
Posts: 142
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2012 4:53 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#173

Unread post by KhalifatulRahman » Wed Jan 23, 2013 12:02 pm

asad wrote:and before Mufaddal saheb becomes Dai, mojizas and stories of 54th have started pouring in

Bani Saify gaam ma ek shakhs che Ali Raashid, bilkul Qaat ukharwaane tayyar nai, banduk lai ne aawe ane eim kahe ke mara paase 10 bachao che, aa lo banduk ane qatal kari lo me ek paiso nai maangu, magar mara qaat na jhaar ne haath na lagaujo, khidmat guzaro ehna c bilkul na umeed thai gaya tha ke aa bhai to nayyaj maane ane ehna c behes karwanu muki didu thu. Gai kaale ittefaq c taha bs saifuddin ye ek khidmat guzar ne fone kido bani saify ma ane Ali Raashid wahaj hato, wo khidmat guzar ye taha bs ne araz kidi ke aa bhai aam kahe che, taha bs ye farmayu ehne fone aapo ane taha bs ye farmayu ke bhai qaat ukharo ek patto b baqi na rahe, ali rashid itno khush thai gayo ane fone par kehwa lago ya sayedi aap mola na farzand chho, aap kaho cho to qaat su me puri mitti, puro pahaar ukhari naakhis, ane fone mukwa baad matha par haath mari mari ne pura gaam ma kahe me taha bs c waat kidi, ane pura qaat ukharwane tayyar thai gayo. Khuda ta'ala Taha bs saifuddin ni Sa'i mashkur karjo ane bewe mola ni aankh ne aap ma thandi karjo, ane bewe mola ni umar shareef daraz karjo.
taha needs some marketing lessons...this is not gonna work this time.

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#174

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Wed Jan 23, 2013 1:46 pm

they are already preparing mojizas about taha's son who will be born soon. in fact his very birth will be a mojiza, it is being claimed by aalims that taha's son will be born via immaculate conception, just as eisa nabi was born to virgin mariyam. the difference being that eisa was born in a manger and his crib was a bed of straw, but taha's son the 55th dai, will be born inside saifee mahal surrounded by gold-plated taps and deep pile carpets. he will be fed honey on a gold spoon encrusted with diamonds.

su ajab shaan na chhe hamara dai ane ena nabeera!

mohammed_truthseeker
Posts: 80
Joined: Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#175

Unread post by mohammed_truthseeker » Wed Jan 23, 2013 10:47 pm

AZ you are hilarious, I enjoy your post. you have a wonderful imaginative mind but sometimes I think you go over the line. but keep writing.

Maqbool
Posts: 844
Joined: Thu May 10, 2007 4:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#176

Unread post by Maqbool » Thu Jan 24, 2013 1:48 am

Beware, very soon Taha bhaisaheb is coming to Bhedi bazar and in one stroke he will convince all those who oppose to vacate the rooms will break the buildings themselves and run on the street shouting that the Taha bhaiheb has given this ajimus shan khidmut and they have purchased jannat!

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#177

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Thu Jan 24, 2013 2:14 pm

mohammed_truthseeker wrote:AZ you are hilarious, I enjoy your post. you have a wonderful imaginative mind but sometimes I think you go over the line. but keep writing.
thanks brother. i would welcome any concrete evidence you have to show where i have crossed the line and i will definitely take corrective measures re: the same.

sometimes when faced with absolutely fantastic and ridiculous mojizas and farmaans based on outright lies, one has to take a few liberties to highlight the tyranny, arrogance, stupidity and intellectual poverty of our clergy and their equally brain-dead followers. some light of realism and rationality has to be shone on their dark deeds. instead of taking up arms and indulging in violence or verbal abuse; gentle ridicule, scorn and biting sarcasm can be employed to great effectiveness. it is said that the day a tyrant becomes the butt of jokes from the general populace, that is the day the countdown to his end begins.

hsnhussain
Posts: 82
Joined: Tue May 26, 2009 7:36 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#178

Unread post by hsnhussain » Sat Jan 26, 2013 5:46 am

Aqa Moula TUS ne gai kale Salman Khan milva
aaya hata ane Mufaddal Moula TUS ne pan salaam karo hato

Fateh
Posts: 303
Joined: Sat Feb 25, 2012 7:25 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#179

Unread post by Fateh » Sat Jan 26, 2013 7:14 am

hsnhussain wrote:Aqa Moula TUS ne gai kale Salman Khan milva
aaya hata ane Mufaddal Moula TUS ne pan salaam karo hato
Bhai, salmankhanbhai e kitno salam kidho hato?ke pachhi mafat ma mili gayo?ke pachhi bewe maulla e salamankhan ne mushafiat aapi hati?jara vistar thi bayan farmavo

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: Bohri SMS Duniya

#180

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Sat Jan 26, 2013 1:57 pm

hsnhussain wrote:Aqa Moula TUS ne gai kale Salman Khan milva
aaya hata ane Mufaddal Moula TUS ne pan salaam karo hato
salman khan had come to sign aali qadr muffy mola for his next movie - dabangg 3 - where the heroine, probably priyanka chopra, is an air-hostess and encounters muffy mola who is flying first class with his retinue of 14 support staff. priyanka has been made an amte bohra in the movie. her rida comes in handy when she has to battle dawat na dushmano in disguise.

salman had to visit the hospital as mola's raza had to be obtained before muffy could agree to play this role.