jokes (keep it clean)

Lighten up a little and talk about movies, music, books and recipes and more... this forum provides the flip side to the intense and serious discussion taking place in other forums. No topic is off-limit here so long as it is within the accepted norms of decency and decorum.
someone
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Jul 11, 2012 9:32 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#121

Unread post by someone » Wed Aug 01, 2012 5:01 am

Mahatma Ghandi walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that his feet became quite thick and hard.
He also was quite a spiritual person.
Even when he was not on a hunger strike, he did not eat much and became quite thin and frail.
Furthermore, due to his diet, he had bad breath...
He came to be known as a super calloused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis.



sixfeetunder
Posts: 433
Joined: Fri Feb 26, 2010 8:48 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#122

Unread post by sixfeetunder » Fri Aug 03, 2012 7:39 pm

Q: What does a Hindu wish someone on their birthday?

A: May you have many happy returns.



lakshya
Posts: 27
Joined: Wed Aug 08, 2012 11:20 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#123

Unread post by lakshya » Fri Aug 10, 2012 5:36 am

A sweet grandmother telephoned St. Joseph’s Hospital. She timidly asked, “Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?
The operator said, “I’ll be glad to help, dear. What’s the name and room number of the patient?”
The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, “Norma Findlay, Room 302.”
The operator replied, “Let me put you on hold while I check with the nurse’s station for that room.”
After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, “I have good news. Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back normal and her physician, Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged tomorrow.”
The grandmother said, “Thank you. That’s wonderful. I was so worried. God bless you for the good news.”
The operator replied, “You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your daughter?”
The grandmother said, “No, I’m Norma Findlay in Room 302. No one ever tells me shit.”



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#124

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Wed Aug 15, 2012 5:55 pm

BOHRA SHAYRI on the eve of Independence Day :-

Yaaro apni jawani deshna naam kari jao,
Yaaro apni jawani deshna naam kari jao,

Par ehna pahla Masjid ma Sabil ane
Wajebat na Paisa to bhari jao.



seeker110
Posts: 1725
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#125

Unread post by seeker110 » Thu Aug 16, 2012 4:14 pm

If its all right I like to add"Mominno tamari jeab khali keri do. Abde hamari tejori bhari do



Shabbir Kapasi
Posts: 3
Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2012 11:50 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#126

Unread post by Shabbir Kapasi » Wed Oct 10, 2012 4:27 am

Ek Baar Duniya Ke 3 Mahan Dharm Guru Ek Saath Ekathhe Huve
Ek Maula
Ek Pop
Ek Moulvi
Tino Ek Dusre Se Puchne Lage Ki Aap Kaise Logo Se Aye Paise Ka Allah Ki Raah Me Istimal Karte He ?

Pop Ne Kaha
Me Ek Room Me Jake Room Ke Bicho Bich Line Banata Hu
Fir Logo Se Aye Paise Uchalta Hu
Jo Bayi Taraf Gire Wo Allah Ka.
Aur Jo Dayi Taraf Gire Wo Mera
Yahi Sawal Moulvi Se Pucha Gaya
Usne Kaha Me Aisa Hi Karta Hu
Lakin
Jo Bayi Taraf Gire Wo Mera.
Aur Jo Dayi Taraf Gire Wo Bhi Mera
Jo Line Pe Gire Wo Allah Ka
Fir Apne Moula Ki Bari Ayee
Usne Kaha Maine Ye Baat Allah Per Chhod Di Hai
Me Bhi Paise Uchalta Hu
Allah Ko Jitna Chahiye Rakh Late He
Baki Ke Muje Vapis Karte He :D



MM Bukhari
Posts: 157
Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2012 4:58 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#127

Unread post by MM Bukhari » Fri Oct 12, 2012 1:11 am

COLD WINTER COMING?
It’s late fall and the Indians on a remote reservation in South Dakota asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild.
Since he was a chief in a modern society, he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky, he couldn’t tell what the winter was going to be like.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect firewood to be prepared.
But, being a practical leader, after several days, he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked, ‘Is the coming winter going to be cold?’
‘It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold,’ the meteorologist at the weather service responded.
So the chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared.
A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. ‘Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?’
‘Yes,’ the man at National Weather Service again replied, ‘it’s going to be a very cold winter.’
The chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.
Two weeks later, the chief called the National Weather Service again. ‘Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?’
‘Absolutely,’ the man replied. ‘It’s looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters we’ve ever seen.’
‘How can you be so sure?’ the chief asked.
The weatherman replied, ‘The Indians are collecting a shitload of firewood !’



zinger
Posts: 1952
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2012 2:40 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#128

Unread post by zinger » Fri Oct 12, 2012 2:19 am

One day an Irishman goes into a pharmacy shop, reaches into his
pocket and takes out a small bottle and a teaspoon.
He pours some liquid onto the teaspoon and offers it to the chemist.

"Could you taste this for me, please?"

The chemist takes the teaspoon, puts it in his mouth, swills the
liquid around and swallows it.

"Does that taste sweet to you?" says Paddy .

"No, not at all," says the chemist.

"Oh that's a relief," says Paddy . "The doctor told me to come here
and get my urine tested for sugar."



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#129

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Oct 15, 2012 4:21 pm

Some Play on Words !!!

Here's more Lexi phi...excellent play on words...enjoy

A bicycle can't stand alone; . . . it is two tired.

A boiled egg is . . . hard to beat.

A dentist and a manicurist married. .. . . They fought tooth and nail.

A thief who stole a calendar . . . got twelve months.

A will is a . . . dead giveaway.

Acupuncture : . . . a jab well done.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.

I was going to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.

I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.

Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. Really it was just a play on words.

I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor.

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I Noah guy.

A new type of broom came out, it is sweeping the nation.

A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital.When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was a nurse said 'No change yet'.

The new weed whacker is cutting-hedge technology.

Some people's noses and feet are built backwards: their feet smell and their noses run.

When William joined the army he disliked the phrase 'fire at will'.

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.

There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.

The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

I wanted to lose weight so I went to the paint store. I heard I could get thinner there.

Lightning sometimes shocks people because it just doesn't know how to conduct itself.

A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.

A rule of grammar: double negatives are a no-no.

Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.

Atheists don't solve exponential equations because they don't believe in higher powers.

It's raining cats and dogs. Well, as long as it doesn't reindeer.

I relish the fact that you've mustard the strength to ketchup to me.

My new theory on inertia doesn't seem to be gaining momentum.

The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.

She got fired from the hot dog stand for putting her hair in a bun.

The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

John Deere's manure spreader is the only equipment the company won't stand behind.

Pencils could be made with erasers at both ends, but what would be the point?

I was arrested after my therapist suggested I take something for my kleptomania.



MM Bukhari
Posts: 157
Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2012 4:58 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#130

Unread post by MM Bukhari » Wed Oct 17, 2012 12:33 am

Too Much Salt
An Afghanistan diplomat visiting the US for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The diplomat was not used to the salt in American foods (French fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies, etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant, Abdul, to fetch him a glass of water.
Time and again Abdul would scamper off and return with a glass of water, but then came the time when he returned empty handed.
“Abdul, you son of an ugly camel, where is my water?” demanded the diplomat.
“A thousand pardons, O Illustrious One,” stammered the wretched Abdul.
“A man is sitting on the well!”



asad
Posts: 777
Joined: Thu Dec 29, 2011 12:54 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#131

Unread post by asad » Thu Dec 06, 2012 4:15 am

Image



khudaparast
Posts: 103
Joined: Sun Nov 11, 2012 4:23 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#132

Unread post by khudaparast » Thu Dec 06, 2012 10:58 pm

asad wrote:Image
hahahahaha



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#133

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Sat Dec 29, 2012 5:08 pm

JUDGE YE NOT

A drunk travelling in a train with his hair a mess, two buttons torn and a bottle of whisky inside his shirt.

A preist sitting opposite him looks at him with disgust and anger.

During the travel the drunk while trying to read a newspaper suddenly turns towards the preist and asks him "Father, how does a person get arthritis ?".

The preist reacts angrily "If you lead an immoral life, hang around with loose women and drink yourself silly, good chance at the end you will end up with arthritis".

The drunk says "oh,is that right father" and goes back to reading the newspaper. The preist then feels he might have overreacted and feeling a bit bad asks the drunk " by the way my son, how long have you had arthritis ?".

The drunk a bit surprised says "oh no father, not me, it says here in the newspaper that the pope has arthritis".



KhalifatulRahman
Posts: 142
Joined: Thu Dec 27, 2012 4:53 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#134

Unread post by KhalifatulRahman » Tue Jan 01, 2013 2:03 am

1. A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he’d found a cat, but it was dead. “How do you know that the cat was dead?” she asked her pupil. “Because I pissed in its ear and it didn’t move,” answered the child innocently. You did WHAT ? ! ?” the teacher exclaimed in surprise. “You know,”explained the boy, “I leaned over and went ‘Pssst!’ and it didn’t move.”

2. A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later…..”Da-ad….” “What?” “I’m thirsty. Can you bring drink of water?” “No, You had your chance. Lights out.” Five minutes later: “Da-aaaad…..” “WHAT?” “I’m THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??”
I told you NO! If you ask again, I’ll have to spank you!!” Five minutes la ter……”Daaaa-aaaad…..” “WHAT!” “When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?”

3. An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him “How do you expect to get into Heaven?”
The boy thought it over and said, “Well, I’ll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door until St. Peter says, ‘For Heaven’s sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!’”

4. One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, “Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?” The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug.
“I can’t dear,” she said. “I have to sleep in Daddy’s room.” A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice; “The big sissy.”

5. It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children’s sermon. All the children were invited to come forward.
One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, “That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?” The little girl replied, directly into the pastor’s clip-on microphone, “Yes, and my Mom says it’s a bitch to iron.”

6. When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, “Mommy, you are getting fat!”
I replied, “Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy.” “I know,” she replied, but what’s growing in your butt?”

7. A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself; “Two plus five, that son of a bitch is seven. Three plus six, that son of a bitch is nine….”
His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, “What are you doing?” The little boy answered, “I’m doing my math homework, Mom.” “And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?” the mother asked. “Yes,” he answered. Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, “What are you teaching my son in math?” The teacher replied, “Right now, we are learning addition.” The mother asked, “And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a bitch is four?” After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered, “What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four.”

8. One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, “…. and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, “The sky is falling, the sky is falling!”
The teacher paused then asked the class, “And what do you think that farmer said?” One little girl raised her hand and said, “I think he said: ‘Holy Shit! A talking chicken!’” The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

9. A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply; “I’m Mr. Sugarbrown’s daughter.”
Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, “I’m Jane Sugarbrown.” The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said; “Aren’t you Mr. Sugarbrown’s daughter?” She replied, “I thought I was, but mother says I’m not.”

10. A little girl asked her mother, “Can I go outside and play with the boys?”; Her mother replied, “No, you can’t play with the boys, they’re too rough.”
The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked; “If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?”

11. A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father; She stands next to the barber chair, while her dad gets his hair cut, eating a snack cake.
The barber says to her, “Sweetheart, you’re gonna get hair on your Twinkie.” She says, “Yes, I know, and I’m gonna get boobs too.”



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#135

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Sun Jan 13, 2013 5:02 pm

Tweets on current affairs

I really don't understand why people consider alcohol to be a problem. Chemically speaking, it's a solution.

If P&G buys Unilever, the unified entity can be called Procter and Gamble and Lever. Abbreviated to PaGaL.

Gandhi would have been a great bowler. He could spin as well as fast.

Baba Ramdev is going to create an army with a headcount of 11,000. Or a leg-count of 22,000. Depending on which side is up.

25-paise coins to go off circulation from Jun 30. The govt feels they can't handle one Anna, so there's no need for four annas.

All MPs to get iPads. Awesome. As some would say, from anPad to iPad in 3 days.

Infosys: More profits means great quarter.
UB: More quarters means great profit.



Conscíous
Posts: 1491
Joined: Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:41 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#136

Unread post by Conscíous » Mon Jan 14, 2013 5:54 pm

I wonder if the Chinese tourists get upset when they buy a souvenir from America and find out it was made in China :roll:



hsnhussain
Posts: 82
Joined: Tue May 26, 2009 7:36 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#137

Unread post by hsnhussain » Thu Jan 17, 2013 10:34 am

Ghana warson pehla ni waat che.
Ek adna mumeen ek raza na saheb saathe ek shahar thi guzri rahya hata.
Su joye che ke poora shahar ma andharu che, fakat ek makaan si roshni aawey che.
Aa mumeen ghana hairaan thaya ane raza na saheb ne arz kidi key
"Janab, poora shahar ma andhaaru che, aney aa ek makaan ma roshni che.
Aa su raaz che??"
Raza na saheb farmawe che
"Bhai, aa khush naseeb makaan ma Generator laagey lu che" :roll:



Conscíous
Posts: 1491
Joined: Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:41 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#138

Unread post by Conscíous » Sat Jan 19, 2013 7:01 pm

ghulam muhammed wrote:BOHRA SHAYRI on the eve of Independence Day :-

Yaaro apni jawani deshna naam kari jao,
Yaaro apni jawani deshna naam kari jao,

Par ehna pahla Masjid ma Sabil ane
Wajebat na Paisa to bhari jao.
My parents, really laughed at this joke :D



Conscíous
Posts: 1491
Joined: Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:41 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#139

Unread post by Conscíous » Sun Jan 27, 2013 10:29 am

A woman awoke during the night to find that her husband was not in bed.. She put on her robe and went downstairs.. He was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffww in front of him.. He appeared to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.. She saw him wipe a tear from his eye and take a sip of his coffee.." Whats the matter dear?? Why are you down here at this time of the night?" she asked. "Do you remember twenty years ago when we were dating and you were only 16?" he asked. " yes, I do, she replied. " Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car making out?" Yes, I remember.""Do you remember when he shoved that shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter or spend twenty years in jail?'" " Yes, I do," she said..

He Wiped another tear from his cheek and said, " You know.... I would have gotten out today :mrgreen:



Conscíous
Posts: 1491
Joined: Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:41 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#140

Unread post by Conscíous » Wed Feb 20, 2013 5:43 pm

64506_306581602798719_734262506_n.jpg
2 dost



Conscíous
Posts: 1491
Joined: Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:41 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#141

Unread post by Conscíous » Wed Feb 20, 2013 6:07 pm

482119_297978106992402_498860275_n.jpg
:shock:



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#142

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Thu Feb 21, 2013 6:12 pm

Ek Murghi ka Kawway se rishta ho gaya,
.
Jab Murghay ko pata chala, to wo Murghi ke paas gaya aur bola:
.
Mujh mein kya kami hai? Smart hoon, Kawway se zyada khoobsurat hoon,
Tumhari biradari ka hoon,

Meri awaz pooray sheher mein goonjti hai, aur

Murghon ki Union ka President bhi hoon”
.
Murghi boli: Main tumhare jazbaat ki qadar karti hun,
.
Lekin!! Amma Abba ki khwahish hai k Ladka Air Force mein ho !



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#143

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Thu Feb 28, 2013 6:03 pm

Globalization

Question:
What is the truest definition of Globalization?

Answer: Princess Diana's death.

Question:
How come?

Answer :
An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, riding in a German car with a Dutch engine,
driven by a Belgian who was drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you change the spelling), followed
closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines.

This is sent to you by a Filipino, using American Bill Gates' technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant,
transported by Indian truck drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexican illegals.....

That, my friends, is Globalization !



wise_guy
Posts: 700
Joined: Sat Jan 28, 2012 5:52 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#144

Unread post by wise_guy » Fri Mar 01, 2013 2:52 am

ek pocha - one mopping cloth
Kai Po Che (latest bollywood movie) - many mopping clothes
Attachments
kaipoche.jpg



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#145

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Mar 04, 2013 4:41 pm

Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, are excessively mischievous.

They are always getting into trouble and their parents know if any mischief occurs in their town, the two boys are probably involved.

The boys' mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys.

The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually.

The mother sent the 8 year old in the morning, with the older boy to see the preacher in the afternoon.

The preacher, a huge man with a deep booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly,
"Do you know where God is, son?"

The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open.

So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner tone,
"Where is God?!

Again, the boy made no attempt to answer.

The preacher raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, "WHERE IS GOD ? !"

The boy screamed & bolted from the room, ran directly home & dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him.

When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked,
"What happened?"

The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied,
"We are in BIG trouble this time!"

"GOD is missing, and they think WE did it !"



seeker110
Posts: 1725
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#146

Unread post by seeker110 » Thu Mar 07, 2013 8:28 pm

Only in USA, a wman goes to the police station with her husband and complains that her husband is talking stupid. (readers digest).



Rocksolid
Posts: 47
Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:22 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#147

Unread post by Rocksolid » Mon Mar 18, 2013 4:06 am

A drunk man arrives late at home and he knows his wife won’t open the door so he decides to pretend that he bought her flowers and knocks the door
Wife: Who is it?
Drunk Husband: I bring flowers for the pretty lady
wife opens the door and says
Where are the flowers
Drunk Husband: Where is the pretty lady?



Rocksolid
Posts: 47
Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:22 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#148

Unread post by Rocksolid » Mon Mar 18, 2013 4:08 am




Rocksolid
Posts: 47
Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2013 11:22 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#149

Unread post by Rocksolid » Mon Mar 18, 2013 4:11 am

Why a man should alwayslet a woman talk first.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... 3pjq0WAupc



ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#150

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Wed Apr 03, 2013 5:57 pm

A US COURT SETS ATHEIST HOLY DAY

In Florida, an American atheist created a case against Easter, Passover and Eid Holy days. He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians, Jews and Muslims and observances of their holy days. The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized days.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring, "Case dismissed!"

The lawyer immediately stood and objecting to the ruling saying, "Your honor, How can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians Have Christmas, Easter and others. The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, the Muslim have Eid day, yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays..."

The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, "But you do. Your client, counselor, is woefully ignorant."

The lawyer said," Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists."

The judge said, "The calendar says April 1st is April Fools Day. Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that, if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is adjourned..."