jokes (keep it clean)

Lighten up a little and talk about movies, music, books and recipes and more... this forum provides the flip side to the intense and serious discussion taking place in other forums. No topic is off-limit here so long as it is within the accepted norms of decency and decorum.
ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#31

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Fri Nov 11, 2011 5:12 pm

*The English Plural*
*according to ....*

*We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox becomes oxen, not oxes;
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese;
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice,
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

*


*If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen ?
If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet ?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth ?

*



*Then one may be that, & three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose;
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother & also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his & him,
But imagine the feminine: she, shis & shim !

*


*Let's face it - **English** is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger;
Neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
**English** muffins weren't invented in England.

*


*We take **English** for granted,
but if we explore its paradoxes,
We find that quicksand can work slowly,
boxing rings are square;
A guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
Why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing,
Grocers don't groce & hammers don't ham ?

*


*Doesn't it seem crazy that ...
you can make amends but not one amend ?
If you have a bunch of odds and ends ...
and get rid of all but one of them,
What do you call it ?

*


*If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught ?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
what does a humanitarian eat ?


*


*Sometimes I think all people who speak** English*
*Should be in an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what other language do people recite at a play,
and play at a recital ?

*


*We ship by truck but send cargo by ship ...
We have noses that run & feet that smell;
We park in a driveway & drive in a parkway.
And how can a slim chance & a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man & a wise guy are opposites ?

*


*You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
in which your house can burn up as it burns down;
In which you fill in a form by filling it out,
& in which an alarm goes off by going on.*

*And in closing ....*
*

**If Father is Pop ....
how come Mother's not Mop ? ? ? ?*

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#32

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Sat Nov 12, 2011 5:05 pm

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful
marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?"

The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her
shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that
because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better
husband than you."

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#33

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Sat Nov 12, 2011 5:09 pm

A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested
"I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU
officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking, polite,
humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to
accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go
out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation
and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and
replied, "I understand you need television."



A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A
worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, "Hi, Emily! Remember me? We
used to date in the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire
husband teased her, "Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife
of a construction worker." She answered,"You should appreciate that you
married me. Other wise, he will be the millionaire and not you."

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#34

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Sat Nov 26, 2011 6:08 pm

A Professor Explained Marketing to MBA Students

1. You see a gorgeous girl in a party, you go to her & say I am rich marry me - That’s – Direct Marketing.

2. You attend a party & your friend goes to a girl & pointing at you tells her. He’ is very rich, marry him - That’s Advertising.

3. Girl walks to you & says you are rich, can you marry me? - “That’s Brand Recognition“

4. You say I m very rich marry me & she slaps you - “That’s Customer Feedback“

5. You say I m very rich marry me & she introduces you to her husband - “That’s Demand & Supply Gap“

6. Before you say I m rich, marry me, you wife arrives - That’s Restriction from Entering New Market.

seeker110
Posts: 1726
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#35

Unread post by seeker110 » Sat Nov 26, 2011 7:06 pm

You know how important it is to stay in shape.You are never too late to get in shape.My grandma was 60 when she started to walk 5 miles everyday.She is know 87 years old and we dont know where the hell she is.

seeker110
Posts: 1726
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#36

Unread post by seeker110 » Sat Nov 26, 2011 8:48 pm

So my wife has medical background and keeps tab on our health.She was taking checking my blood pressure.I asked how does it look.she said your heart is great,but the problem is in the brain.

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#37

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Thu Dec 08, 2011 5:58 pm

There was a man who worked for the Post Office whose job was to process all the mail that had illegible addresses.
One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.

The letter read:
Dear God,
I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had $100 in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension payment. Next Sunday is Christmas, and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with, have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me?

Sincerely, Edna

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars.

By the time he made the rounds, he had collected $96, which they put into an envelope and sent to the woman.

The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.

Christmas came and went.

A few days later, another letter came from the same old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened.

It read:

Dear God,

How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift. By the way, there was $4 missing. I think it might have been those bastards at the post office.

Sincerely, Edna

Conscíous
Posts: 1491
Joined: Sun Nov 29, 2009 4:41 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#38

Unread post by Conscíous » Thu Dec 08, 2011 6:22 pm

Haha :mrgreen: ^^

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#39

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Fri Dec 09, 2011 5:46 pm

An engineer dies and reports to the Pearly Gates.

Saint Peter checks his dossier and, not seeing his name there, accidentally sends him to Hell.

It doesn’t take long before the engineer becomes rather dissatisfied with the level of comfort in Hell.

He soon begins to design and build improvements. Shortly thereafter, Hell has air conditioning, flush toilets and escalators. Needless to say, the engineer is a pretty popular guy.

One day, God calls Satan and says with a sneer: “So, how are things in Hell?”

Satan replies: “Hey, things are going great. We’ve got air conditioning, flush toilets, and escalators. And there’s no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next.”

“What!” God exclaims: “You’ve got an engineer? That’s a mistake — he should never have been sent to Hell… send him to me.”

“Not a chance,” Satan replies: “I like having an engineer on the staff, and I’m keeping him!”

God insists: “Send him back or I’ll sue.”

Satan laughs uproariously and answers: “Yeah, right. And where are you going to get a lawyer?”

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#40

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Fri Dec 09, 2011 6:36 pm

'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.

She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.'

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#41

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Sat Dec 10, 2011 4:51 pm

This is a collection of `Leave' letters and applications written by people in various places in India.

1. Infosys, Bangalore: An employee applied for leave as follows:
Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave.

2. This is from Oracle Bangalore:
From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son: "as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days."

3. Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave ..."

4. From H.A.L. Administration dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."

5. Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o’clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"

6. An incident of a leave letter
"I am suffering from fever, please declare one day holiday."

7. A leave letter to the headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"

8. Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."

9. Covering note: "I am enclosed herewith..."

10. Another one:
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."

11. Actual letter written for application of leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".

12. Letter writing: -
"I am in well here and hope you are also in the same well."

13. A candidate's job application:
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a 'Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post.”

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#42

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Mon Dec 12, 2011 4:38 pm

two gujrati ladies complain about a bhelpuri wala to the police that he is a mawali, an indecent rascal who molested them.

when the police start hammering the vendor, he says 'arey mai baap, hamne to wohi kiya jo in ladies ne kaha'.

incredulous police ask the vendor sarcastically, 'kya unhone tumhe kaha ke unki chedkhani karo?!'

bhelpuriwala says, 'o saab, ye mahila aakar boli ke "mujhko ragdo, aur usko chaat", to maine wohi kiya'....

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#43

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Dec 12, 2011 5:35 pm

A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which ended by saying: "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and goodbye Grandpa."

The father asked, "Why did you say goodbye Grandpa?"

The little girl said, "I don't know daddy, it just seemed like the thing to do."

The next day grandpa died. The father thought it was a strange coincidence.

A few months later the father put the girl to bed and listened to her prayers which went like this: "God bless Mommy, God Bless Daddy and goodbye Grandma." The next day the grandmother died.

"Holy Moley, thought the father, this kid is in contact with the other side.

Several weeks later when the girl was going to bed the dad heard her say: "God bless Mommy and goodbye Daddy." He practically went into shock.

He couldn't sleep all night and got up at the crack of dawn to go to his office. He was nervous as a cat all day, had lunch and watched the clock. He figured if he could get by until midnight he

Would be okay. He felt safe in the office, so instead of going home at the end of the day he stayed there, drinking coffee, looking at his watch and jumping at every sound.

Finally, midnight arrived, he breathed a sigh of relief and went home. When he got home his wife said, "I've never seen you work so late, what's the matter?"

He said, "I don't want to talk about it, I've just spent the worst day of my life."

She said, "You think you had a bad day, you'll never believe what happened to me. This morning my golf professor dropped dead in the middle of my lesson.

seeker110
Posts: 1726
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#44

Unread post by seeker110 » Tue Dec 13, 2011 1:31 am

JJebus loves me yes i know
For the bible tells me so
If he screams let him go
Ennie minnei myna mo

anajmi
Posts: 13402
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2001 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#45

Unread post by anajmi » Tue Dec 13, 2011 1:58 am

Just because there is a thread used by most
doesn't mean senseless shit you have to post
and I don't mean to boast
but that one was staler than a month old french toast.

feelgud
Posts: 725
Joined: Tue Feb 14, 2006 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#46

Unread post by feelgud » Tue Dec 13, 2011 2:56 am

A lady to a beggar : Hey boy!! I have certainly seen you some where :O :/ ?

Beggar: Oh madam, you forgot me!!
.
.
.
.
.
We are friends on facebook..:-D

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#47

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Tue Dec 13, 2011 6:49 pm

Every man should get married some time; after all, happiness is not the only thing in life!! --Anonymous

Bachelors should be heavily taxed. It is not fair that some men should be happier than others. --Oscar Wilde

Don't marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper. --Scottish Proverb

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. --Sam Kinison

Men have a better time than women; for one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.--H. L. Mencken

When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone wonders why.

Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
You can be sure of one thing:
Either the car is new or the wife.

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back to home always. --Anonymous

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary? " She said,"Somewhere I have never been!" I told her,
"How about the kitchen?" --Anonymous

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops...

seeker110
Posts: 1726
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#48

Unread post by seeker110 » Wed Dec 14, 2011 5:47 pm

Biggest problem being married is every khuti including the hat rack is filled with her coats.The coats in the closet are old and out of fashion.Still to dear to donate.Even the suit cases in garage have coats in them.Right she is when she says she has nothing to wear.

anajmi
Posts: 13402
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2001 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#49

Unread post by anajmi » Wed Dec 14, 2011 6:07 pm

seeker,

You complain more about your wife than the progressives complain about the Syedna. Have you ever tried talking to her?

seeker110
Posts: 1726
Joined: Mon Apr 24, 2006 4:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#50

Unread post by seeker110 » Wed Dec 14, 2011 7:14 pm

Please dont stop giving me new ideas since you are full of it.I pity the man who shuts himself to new ideas even when it has to do with religion.Life is all down hill from then on.I am glad you reached the peak.

anajmi
Posts: 13402
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2001 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#51

Unread post by anajmi » Wed Dec 14, 2011 7:27 pm

I am always open to new ideas. I would love a scandinavian chinese buffet prepared in your mosque. Please don't tell me you chickened out of that. Or do you prefer new ideas only as long as someone else implements them?

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#52

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Fri Dec 23, 2011 6:54 pm

Proverbs and their opposites

NEWTON'S THIRD LAW STATES: "EVERY ACTION HAS AN EQUAL AND AN OPPOSITE REACTION".

SO IT WOULD STAND TO REASON THAT EVERY PROVERB HAS AN EQUAL AND OPPOSITE PROVERB.




ALL GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT

BUT

TIME AND TIDE WAIT FOR NONE



THE PEN IS MIGHTIER THAN THE SWORD

BUT

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS



WISE MEN THINK ALIKE

BUT

FOOLS SELDOM DIFFER



THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE

BUT

THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS A FREE LUNCH



SLOW AND STEADY WINS THE RACE

BUT

TIME WAITS FOR NONE



LOOK BEFORE YOU LEAP

BUT

STRIKE WHILE THE IRON IS HOT



DO IT WELL, OR NOT AT ALL

BUT

HALF A LOAF IS BETTER THAN NONE



BIRDS OF A FEATHER FLOCK TOGETHER

BUT

OPPOSITES ATTRACT



DON'T CROSS YOUR BRIDGES BEFORE YOU COME TO THEM

BUT

FOREWARNED IS FOREARMED

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#53

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Fri Dec 23, 2011 7:40 pm

DOO-BAI.

Dubai is the land of the biggest, tallest, longest, widest, richest, fanciest, fastest...everything is ... in the world.

They have the tallest residential towers in the world, the tallest restaurant in the world, the largest number of Malbaris in the world, the highest crane operator in the world.

If it does not grow in Dubai, they' ll make it artificially - artificial ski slopes, artificial islands, artificial oasis, coconut trees and lawns, artificial beaches, artificial economy.

Indians especially love it here because of the dirham-to-rupee value. Pakistani's adore it.

The Egyptians come here because there is nothing to do in Egypt. No more pyramids to build either.

The Filipinos come here because they have no choice; there's nothing back home, not even dogs - they've been eaten up.

The Brits come here coz they have forgotten what it is to enjoy 3 meals a day in UK and nobody employs them there for the crap they give.

The Lebanese come here to buy cars, dress to kill, wear Peter Pan shoes 10 sizes bigger than their feet, put 1 kg of gel on their heads and give everyone ball talk. They'll buy a 1980s Merc or BMW for 10k dirhams and drive the car like they're sitting in the rear passenger seat, stretching their arms all the way to the steering wheel, giving you the piercing bald eagle look.

Russian girls come here for "fun".

The Bangladeshis come here to serve you when you honk outside a Bakala (shop), but would not even look at you if you park and go inside to pickup yourself.

Now according to the government Dubai is Tax free. Of course, that is true. You only have to pay for the visa, medical, sponsor, insurance, resident ID, opening a bank account or even closing an account, municipality, sewerage, attestation of papers, translation of papers, driving license papers, lessons, car license, testing, and .... but the salary is Tax Free.

Only, there is a Pay and Park scheme with 5000 parking lots, and 500,000 cars in the city, so where the hell do you park? And you are fined for wrong parking.

Toll has been introduced on many roads. You can avoid the toll tax by using alternative routes, but you'll end up in a traffic jam because everyone is trying to avoid the toll tax.

If you have any government related work like medicals for visa or immigration, you have 2 options - Standard and Urgent Procedure. Standard takes 7 days and Urgent takes 1 day. The difference is 100-odd dirhams. Everyone goes for the urgent option and the Dubai government makes money, urgently.

If you switch jobs you get a work ban and to lift the ban you pay a huge penalty.

In Dubai, without a car you are paralyzed (you don't even get jobs if you don't have a car). But you'll get your license in attempts ranging from 2 to 20. Each time you fail you have paid fees for Driving Classes & Driving Tests, which are 1000-odd dirhams. Imagine the money RTA makes.

Most of the expats live alone with families back home. So they spend much on phone calls. And call charges from Dubai are high.

Another odd thing about Dubai - no matter where you go or who you meet, you take down phone numbers. Everybody has everybody's number in Dubai. And everyone has a Visiting Card, whether you are a bootlegger, a masseuse, a hooker, a car cleaner, a watchman or a pizza delivery boy. Everyone knocks around with lots of cards in his or her wallet and one card in the palm. So whenever you shake hands with anyone in Dubai and let go, you end up with a visiting card in your palm.

If youre walking on the road and you ask someone the time, he'll tell you 10:30, give you his card and say, I have new and second-hand watches.

At a restaurant when you are leaving they'll say, here is my card, call me for home delivery.

If you're below your building, you'll meet those Chinese chicks giving you their cards, saying, call us if you want DVDs.

If you are standing at a bus stop, a Pakistani will pull over in his 1980 Toyota Corolla, give you his card and say, If you want Pick-up & Drop Service, call me.

Dubai has amusing buildings. Some have holes in them, some have giant balls on them, some look like airplanes, some look like sail boats, and, all of them reach into space with your window right in front of the moon.

Everyone in Dubai goes to malls, not necessarily to shop. To beat the heat, go to a mall; business meeting, go to a mall; getting bored, go to a mall; want to take a leak or dump, go to a mall; want to do lukhagiri (little in your pocket, little in your mind), go to a mall.

If you want to go for a picnic go to a mall.

Some Malbaris go home to Kerala, get married, and then come to a Dubai Mall for their honeymoon.

THAT...MY FRIENDS.....IS
DOO-BAI

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#54

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Jan 02, 2012 3:07 pm

President Obama and the Canadian PM are shown a time machine which can see 50 years into the future. They both decide to test it by asking a question each.

President Obama goes first: "What will the USA be like in 50 years’ time?"

The machine whirls and beeps and goes into action and gives him a printout, he reads it out: "The country is in good hands under the new president, José Fernandez.... Crime is non-existent, there is no conflict, the economy is healthy. Vice President Jin Tao has declared Chinese language mandatory in all US schools There are no worries."

The Canadian PM thinks, "It's not bad, this time machine, I'll have a bit of that" so he asks: "What will Canada be like in 50 years’ time?"

The machine whirls and beeps and goes into action, and he gets a printout. But he just stares at it.

"Come on, David," says Obama, "Tell us what it says."..

"I Can't ! It is all in Punjabi".

Al Zulfiqar
Posts: 4609
Joined: Tue Mar 28, 2006 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#55

Unread post by Al Zulfiqar » Mon Jan 02, 2012 3:44 pm

bro.gm,

what the machine failed to add was that the punjabi was being spoken by a jewish dominated parliament!

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#56

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Jan 02, 2012 4:46 pm

bro AZ,

It could have been the bastardised version of hebrew blended with punjabi. :lol:

anajmi
Posts: 13402
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2001 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#57

Unread post by anajmi » Mon Jan 02, 2012 6:35 pm

Care to take a shot at what the Saifee Mahal looks like 50 years from now?

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#58

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Jan 02, 2012 7:19 pm

anajmi wrote:Care to take a shot at what the Saifee Mahal looks like 50 years from now?
It would be no better then the house of Dracula as 50 years is more then enough time for Allah (swt) to cast his wrath on the evildoers who play with His religion and lead people astray. We could probably see the same zaadas standing with begging bowls at the gates of saifee mahal but sadly the 52nd dai wont be a part of it as no amount of 'Abyat Sharifa' recited daily by the abdes for his 'Shifa-e-kulli' is going to convince Allah (swt) to prolong his life for another 50 odd years.

anajmi
Posts: 13402
Joined: Wed Jan 10, 2001 5:01 am

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#59

Unread post by anajmi » Mon Jan 02, 2012 7:24 pm

I believe that in 50 years Saifee Mahal would be undergoing the kind of renovation that we haven't seen since Cecil B. DeMille showed it to us in The Ten Commandments where the Pharoah was building the great Pyramids or his palaces. Replace the Bani Israel with the abdes and the then Syedna with the Pharoah. Only problem being, there is no moses coming for the abdes!!

ghulam muhammed
Posts: 11653
Joined: Tue Oct 07, 2008 5:34 pm

Re: jokes (keep it clean)

#60

Unread post by ghulam muhammed » Mon Jan 02, 2012 7:31 pm

The problem is that the abdes have mistaken the dai as Moses instead of Pharoah. By the way the arabian sea is not very far from saifee mahal but alas we wont see it splitting and creating a safe passage for the abdes.