clippedwings wrote:I started this thread because I had very openly spoken out about my views of MS. People contacted me directly, applauding my bravery. However, my family have been harassed in masjid by the ayaans and some staunchly religious people. I have definitely felt the repercussions of speaking up, as now my family have put pressure on me to be silent. I feel inner turmoil, as I want to continue to stand by what I believe in and call out injustice when I see it, but when your family ask you to stop because they are affected by it, that obviously has an effect.
I wanted to know whether others were having similar experiences, and if so, what have you done? If not, what did you do differently from me? And if you haven't spoken up, what suggestions do you have for those who wish to do so? Can speaking up make a difference, or is it a drop in the ocean?
Listen to your conscience’s common sense, it is liberating from many dumm and stupid superstitious rituals and time wasting activities Kothari INC imposes on abdes to keep themselves employed.
You are on your journey to become a free – thinking soul.
I was in the same situation years back, having started on this journey, I feel much better leaving behind the ignorance, deception, stupidity and slavery I was gloating in. With age and time you will become more and more clear. Don’t panic; keep your calm and first and foremost distance your heart and conscience from the wrongdoings. You don’t have to be loud about it. Self realization is for you to revel in, for you to struggle in, this is your akheraat. Save yourself first completely.
Laws of attraction work very well, soon you will surround yourselves with like minded individuals and even if you are surrounded by orthodoxed, conservative, ignorant, chest beating, feet kissing, zombie abdes you have awakened from this curse you will either pity them or laugh them off.
Having crawled or atleast peeked out of the abde hole. There is a big world out there, filled with diversity, tolerance and acceptance. Once you change your outlook, the world has changed.
Stand up for weak and those who wish to be helped, regardless if they are abdes or not. Everyone has to fight for themselves, no need to go hyperactive, super-hero mode and get beaten up by these Kothari thugs. Saving one self from kothar is an individual struggle, it is a struggle of a bigger nature and higher purpose.. It is just not saving yourself from some “smooth” talking conmen to save few bucks. But it is a struggle to get rid of greed and insecurity and fear that dwells in us that makes us dependent or paralyzed on such thugs who feeds on these weaknesses. Introspect your principles, get clarity, what are you going away from; what kothar stands for ? Else you will escape from one hell–hole and get into another.
Kothar preys on weak, submissive, insecured, greedy, fearful abdes. Steadily and quietly get out of their radar and show them you are not any of the above. They will leave you alone. They too don’t wanna spend their energy fighting you when there are many bakraas (fishes) in the bohra sea.
Your family will always have some nosy, peeky, over concerned, fanatic, extremist orthodoxed conservative interfering panchaayti relative; ignore them as much as you can. (good riddance to bad rubbish) They are harmless farts just proving their walwalo and doing itsy bitsy pushing around assuming they are doing great service for their aaqaa and maula ni khushi. Nowadays kothar has lowered standards of ibaadat to depressing levels.
You will also come across spying local mullahs and sheikhs who are pesky salemen selling Kothari products, it is these conmen one must learn to deal with. Firm stand with limited response should do the trick. Don’t engage with these thugs too much. Stay away as much as possible. they too want quick and responsive bakraas as they targets to cover for ziyafats, majlises and other chamchagiri they have taken onto their shoulders.
Don’t pay, just don’t pay for everything. Pay only where you believe it is going in the service of the community. best, do it yourself. Like volunteer to provide food packets, ration, sponsor a fan, a/c, carpet for masjids or markaz if you feel necessary. If at all you have to pay anywhere, demand receipts / invoices.
If you are worried about your parent’s views on faith and your rebellious turmoil. Don’t be too harsh with them, give it time or just sail along. Slowly and steadily work on their views. You can always practice your freedom and honest faith in true spirit within your heart.
Be objective, don’t start hating everyone, always use your sense of reasoning and compassion to accept people with different POVs as long as they are not imposing, if one enjoys being an abde and loves to get fleeced ; enjoy the show.