So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

The one and only free public forum for Bohras. The focus of this forum is the reform movement, the Dawoodi Bohra faith and, of course, the corrupt priesthood. But the discussion is in no way restricted to the Bohras alone.
mumineen
Posts: 494
Joined: Sun Dec 10, 2000 5:01 am

So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#1

Unread post by mumineen » Sat Mar 05, 2005 3:41 pm

After many years, a young Kothari Bohri who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family in the old country.

"But--where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him.

"Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a beard."

"But at least you pray the Jumma prayers?”

"Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Friday."

"But halal food you still eat?"

"Mama, in America, it is very difficult to eat halal food."

The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, "Huzeifa, tell me--you’re still circumcised?"

JC
Posts: 1624
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2004 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#2

Unread post by JC » Mon Mar 07, 2005 5:56 pm

So whats wrong about it ...??!!!

Everybody is FREE to elect and select what he or she likes for one's own self. Why there are people who are bent upon interfering in one's life. Generally, i assume that we all get basic education and then we strive for what we need and whatever our minds quest for. Some are contended, some go for more. Some stay same, some change. the life goes on.

Why beard, I have no beard, why so much fuss about praying on time, why 'Halal' - if i m convinced, i should or should not eat something, i will follow. I can appreicate for many rasons pork is not good, i agree, so i donot eat. Drinking, well, there are reasons and options, so sometimes i decide to drink (and by the way, i personally know some hard core bohras, doing purjosh matams too who drink and ....!!! too - by i am NOT to question them .... its theri choice). So Mumeeneen ae so sarcastic. For 'Khatna' (guys i love this word.... lol) - well thousands in AmeriKa do this as it is good, so why not. AND let me add one more thing - no one should mind my business with whom i sleep with, person of opposite sex or same sex...!!!! Perhaps Mumin forgot to add this too ....
'Huzifa, beta tuao CHOKRA sathay tau nathee sautoo...!!!!!!!!

Humsafar
Posts: 2608
Joined: Sat Dec 16, 2000 5:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#3

Unread post by Humsafar » Mon Mar 07, 2005 7:04 pm

Calm down JC. It's just a joke.

mumineen
Posts: 494
Joined: Sun Dec 10, 2000 5:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#4

Unread post by mumineen » Tue Mar 08, 2005 12:49 am

JC:

Try taking the test on the following website to evaluate and assess your sense of humour:

http://www.members.shaw.ca/canadahumour/humoureval.html

We bet you should score 20 at least.

YIKES!. And hence you will feel compelled to seek further professional assistance or counselling.

JC
Posts: 1624
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2004 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#5

Unread post by JC » Tue Mar 08, 2005 2:53 pm

Humsafar,

Thanks

Mumin Bhai

Thanks to u too....

Guys, u know at times one is in not so good mood and gets irritated or frustrated .... so thats the way it is ....

Mumin Bhai, test laywanee RAZA tau leeday lee chay nay, wagar raza test na laywee ....

mumineen
Posts: 494
Joined: Sun Dec 10, 2000 5:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#6

Unread post by mumineen » Tue Mar 08, 2005 3:49 pm

JC:

OK (AAh SO!!- as the Chinese would say). You score 140. Profound apologies for second-guessing your s-o-h.

Mark of a gentleman/lady is to acknowledge his/her errors or shortcomings and act on not repeating them again. Sometimes it is difficult, but one can only try.

Salaams

JC
Posts: 1624
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2004 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#7

Unread post by JC » Wed Mar 09, 2005 3:07 pm

Mumin,

thanks. hey why don't u add one more line to that joke.
'Huzeifa tau chokra sathay tau nathee sautoo na'

U see i have sao many questions and i must appreciate many are trying to answer me including u, porus, AB, Anajmi, serendipity and i m thankful to all.

Guys keep on posting some good stuff too.

Regards

MOHD HUSSAIN
Posts: 443
Joined: Sun Aug 19, 2001 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#8

Unread post by MOHD HUSSAIN » Fri Mar 11, 2005 4:46 pm

J C ; This is one of my favorite joke that I love to tell --


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
This happened on a return trip to india on a jet plane when the captain announced the failure of the engines & a possible survival by deployment of the parachutes.The head count was taken by the stewardess & she frantically told the Pilot she was short of 4 parachutes & asked his help! Just as they were exhausted of all the options,another stewardess came running to the cabin & told "captain ! Dont worry, we have 4 bohri women sitting in back who are already wearing the parachutes,"

JC
Posts: 1624
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2004 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#9

Unread post by JC » Mon Mar 14, 2005 2:36 pm

Mohd Hussain

Good one ... indeed..

There is lot on these REDAs too .... these days there is a new type of rida, of TIGHT fitting from waist to knees and than with a big freel - like wedding dress of Christian ladies. The top parachaute remains the same for the time being..!!!

MOHD HUSSAIN
Posts: 443
Joined: Sun Aug 19, 2001 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#10

Unread post by MOHD HUSSAIN » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:38 pm

Jc Thanks for the info- I did not know! Here is another of mine--

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here is another one on the Sheikh, This rich fanatic bohra mulla made lots of money in the stock market(2 yrs ago)so he wanted to upgrade his title to Sheikh,Moula happened to be in the city so araz drama was played back & forth,finally salaam of $ 75052 was agreed upon.Well the Mulla had a nice arabian horse &he decided to get a Sheikh title for him too!So a request was made for the same & they told him the same amount of salaams for him too. Well the Mulla got pretty upset & complained that the Amount for the horse-just an animal-was excessive. His complaint was forwarded to Moula -He smiled & told them -"go tell him that so far I have only made so many Gadhas (donkeys)as Sheikhs,He will have the first horse in the history to be adorned as Sheikh"

JC
Posts: 1624
Joined: Wed Sep 29, 2004 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#11

Unread post by JC » Fri Mar 18, 2005 2:28 pm

Mohad Hussain,

Indeed good one. In fact, all the bohras are being treated as donkeys, but shaikh are those who pay for it too...!!! so DD (double-donkey) as if some one pays to get himself f******..!!!!

serendipity
Posts: 145
Joined: Wed Jun 05, 2002 4:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#12

Unread post by serendipity » Sat Mar 19, 2005 4:07 am

My Dear Brother JC & Co. Please consider for a moment something that is RARELY mentioned on this board (because it takes courage to do so): What if our "missing" Imam IS REAL, but has absolutely nothing to do with the self-serving kothar! Now where does that leave Syedna and his merry men.... And where does that leave all of you so-called "Progressives"? Have you honestly even CONSIDERED the possibility that the Dawoodi's are NOT the heirs and successors of the Fatimid tradition of Islam?

Alislam
Posts: 234
Joined: Wed Nov 13, 2002 5:01 am

Re: So you became an Amrikan Bohri!

#13

Unread post by Alislam » Sat Mar 19, 2005 10:12 am

Salaam
__________________________________________________

And where does that leave all of you so-called "Progressives
__________________________________________________

It is indeed very sad to see the remarks of some of our progressives, who though talk of various ortho-progressive issues on one side, but takes no heed in even finding faults with the Quran, Prohphet and the Imams.

I really doubt that these people really believe in Islam any more.

was salaam