Bohra SMS Duniya

[ghulam muhammed]

Aqa Moula TUS ne gai kale Salman Khan milva

aaya hata ane Mufaddal Moula TUS ne pan salaam karo hato

Salman Khan regularly visits this forum and after seeing the Dai's conduct he decided to gift a truckload of T-Shirts to the Dai,Mansoos and the entire qasre mawali clan.................................. The T-Shirt which has "BEING HUMAN" printed in bold.

[ghulam muhammed]

Salman left with a warning that "Agar ab bhi tum nahi sudhre to hum tum mein itne chhed kar denge ke confuse ho jaoge ki saans kahan se le aur paade kahan se" !!

[humanbeing]

Kothar Productions Presents
Popular Movie titles by Saifee Studios and Burhan Entertainment Venture

Aaao Darees Karein
Bachna Ae Mumino
Anmol Saya
Rida Ke Rakhwale
Bayaan Ke After Affects
2 Mithaas 2 Kharas ( 2 Fast & 2 Furious LoL)
Lage Raho Amil Saab ( The Endless Bayaan)
Jannat Ka Jamindaar
Ghulam-e-Sayedna
Ek Thaal Sola Haath
Maula ne Bana Di Jodi
Salaam, Ziyafat or Mafsusiyat
Chalo Dewri !
Deewana Abde
Mumin Se Badhkar Kaun
Ziyafat Apni Pet Paraya
Kasam Topi Ki
Topi, Libaas or Salaam
Jhuk Gaya Abde
Sabse Bada Salaam
Kaho na Izan Hai
Kabhi Darees Kabhi Jaman
Misaaq To Hona Hi Tha
Ye Thaal Humara Hai
Salaam Bina Raza Kaha !

[asad]

No more Bikes or two wheeler for khidmatguzars that is moallims, aamils, people in vazarat or kothar cant drive bikes only repercussion of this 100 B.C farman is that bohras will have to either bear their transportation cost by cars or three wheeler or will have to foot the bill of cars for already pampered and spoilt clergy.

=======================================================================================================

Sh.saifuddin bhai yamani ( in khdmt of shz.husainah bs) met wit an accident in the morning...hospital ma admit thaya to dua vaste araz thai...ali qadar moula ye farmayu k sagla khdmt guzaro & ehna azwaaj have si 2-wheeler na chalave n sagla vechile. 3 tyms taaqeed c farmayu his daughtr confrmd d news
Aqa Moulla Ye Farmayu Che Ke Hawe Si Koi Bhi Bike Na Chalawe Ane Bike Na Pachal Bhi Na Bese Ane Ghare Bike Bhi Na Rakhe Ane Jo Hoi To Aje Ne Aje Sell Kari De
Hamna Jamea ma meeting hati ehma em kidu ke:
Aali Qadar Moula na farman aali chhe ke koi bhi Two Wheeler istemaal bilkul naa kare ane paachal bhi bethe nahi.

[Al Zulfiqar]

as quoted on this forum itself, only a short while ago, an abde fell from his cycle and came out completely unharmed because he was transporting the miraculous faize mawaid burhani dabba.

it logically follows therefore that this yamani fellow must have not have been carrying one on his person or strapped somewhere on his 2 wheeler. the question that obviously begs an answer is why has the aali qadr mansoos directed his exhortation towards all 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' only?

1. is it because these unholy rascals have not been subscribing to the fmb dabba scheme?
2. or the haramkhors have been having the dabba gratis, stealing the food without paying?
3. or they have been privy to some hygiene hanky-panky inside the fmb kitchens and have therefore given the dabbas a wide berth?
4. or these 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' are hardcore sinners who are better protected and concealed inside closed hard-shell vehicles, where they cannot be seen stealing by the ghaib na malik?
5. or someone from mansoos' inner circle has a business buying and selling used 2 wheelers and has prevailed upon mansoos to create a scare among these 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' idiots, so that they will go into panic mode, dispose of their bikes at throwaway prices, and this rascal will mop them all up, laughing all the way to the bank?
6. is this going to be some very subtle and clever way of introducing a new tax on an already badly screwed and bleeding community, a 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz sawaari' tax, whereby a certain % will be added to your wajebaat dues every year?

i will not put it past wily abdes who will rush to join the 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' brigade in droves, so that they will not only get a free ride in CARS to every jaman, but get to wipe out the extra kharas and mithaas and bring additionally generous portions at home!

i dont know about you guys, but i have already registered to be a trooper in the 'khidmatguzaar ane ena azwaaz' battalion.

[Bohra spring]

Wow how lucky for the mumeena who are accustomed to dabba...

Muffy next time will not only ban transportation on 2 wheelers he may ban the dabba

Az we may have to bring the Star Trek technology forward by a few years...you remember the one we had planned to launch when 54 th was inaugurated ....the dabba transporters that uses antigravity propulsion...

If that does not work yet what about 3d printing the dabba and its content at the home by online ordering from www2.muffymawaid.org

[Maqbool]

The farman is only for khidmat gujar. This proves Kaka's assumptions of class in other thread. Many amils in small towns travels back sheet of two wheeler, will now demand four wheelers and at the cost of small jamat the Amil will enjoy luxury, the scheduled cast will move on legs or bicycle. Aliqader su tamri chal che!

[zinger]

as quoted on this forum itself, only a short while ago, an abde fell from his cycle and came out completely unharmed because he was transporting the miraculous faize mawaid burhani dabba.

it logically follows therefore that this yamani fellow must have not have been carrying one on his person or strapped somewhere on his 2 wheeler. the question that obviously begs an answer is why has the aali qadr mansoos directed his exhortation towards all 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' only?

1. is it because these unholy rascals have not been subscribing to the fmb dabba scheme?
2. or the haramkhors have been having the dabba gratis, stealing the food without paying?
3. or they have been privy to some hygiene hanky-panky inside the fmb kitchens and have therefore given the dabbas a wide berth?
4. or these 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' are hardcore sinners who are better protected and concealed inside closed hard-shell vehicles, where they cannot be seen stealing by the ghaib na malik?
5. or someone from mansoos' inner circle has a business buying and selling used 2 wheelers and has prevailed upon mansoos to create a scare among these 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' idiots, so that they will go into panic mode, dispose of their bikes at throwaway prices, and this rascal will mop them all up, laughing all the way to the bank?
6. is this going to be some very subtle and clever way of introducing a new tax on an already badly screwed and bleeding community, a 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz sawaari' tax, whereby a certain % will be added to your wajebaat dues every year?

i will not put it past wily abdes who will rush to join the 'khidmatguzaars ane ena azwaaz' brigade in droves, so that they will not only get a free ride in CARS to every jaman, but get to wipe out the extra kharas and mithaas and bring additionally generous portions at home!

i dont know about you guys, but i have already registered to be a trooper in the 'khidmatguzaar ane ena azwaaz' battalion.

you obviously havent been to a masjid in such a long time that you have forgotten what a khidmatguzaar does.

let me refresh your memory.

these are the people who, even after fasting all day long in Ramzan will always serve you tea, before breaking their roza.

These are the people who even after fasting all day long, will selflessly serve thaal after thaal, without once loosing their cool and make sure that everyone is well fed, before they sit down to eat the leftovers

so, if these khidmat guzaars eat up the leftovers, which in some cases i agree might be a lot, and take it home, rather than see it go to waste, where is the harm in it? infact they are entitled to eat a little more given that they were hungry even after everyone has had their fill and gone home.

i have seen instances where the khidmatguzars have fed the best food to people in the thaal and themselves been content only with the rice and gravy because all the food is over. and this i say with complete certainity, after having seen with my own eyes... during Muharram and Ramzan. One Ashura, i have seen them eat only bread and kadhi since even the khichda was over.

And if you call them haramkhors, then you are to be forgiven, pitied and ignored, because the haramkhorgiri is in your blood and your neeyat. nothing that can be done about it.

[Rising Star]

now let me tell u what inside story is....

from long time all these fat tummy jamea ustaad wanted cars individually, but they were kept on hold by kothar, coz that could have create trouble for them, and even public would have shown some action.

but it seems now all ustaadz have team up and pressured muffy, soon u will see all ustadz who were driving bikes and scooties will be given personal car, and they also got excuse of raza by muffy....its all scam, its a planned out accident and story.

[Rising Star]

how I know this? because I was engaged with one of ustaadz daughter, which eventually broke up, coz of my weird views on muffy mola LOL

[Al Zulfiqar]

zinger,

lagta hai bhai tumko bahut zinger mirchi lagi hai!

what you have adopted is a tried and tested tactic of diverting the issue with frivolous and stupid arguments. the point of discussion was why kaderbhai mansoos has decided to have 'khidmatguzaars and ena azwaaz' only travelling in cars and not 2 wheelers.

as for your astute observations on 'khidmatguzaars and ena azwaaz', you have only observed, whilst i have been for many years and still continue to be a khidmati during functions in our markaz/masjids. 95% of the time the rascals ferret away the food even before the public have been served. they make sure they have the best and choicest portions remaining, the public be damned. in fact, the weasels slink away with their dabbas and secure them inside their locked cars so that they have extras to feast on at home. yes, there are a self-sacrificing few who serve out of a genuine intention to feed the public, even if they remain hungry. it has happened with me too on a couple of occasions.

but once again the question is why kaderbhai mansoos is not exhorting these thieves to protect themselves on 2 wheelers with the miraculous fmb dabbas which have been proven with so many mojizas? if any ordinary abde can walk away without a scratch because of these dabbas, then a devoted and loyal abde 'khidmatguzaar and ena azwaaz' should have even more divine protection?

think about this while the zinger takes deleterious effect on your nether regions.

[think]

Karachi khidmat gujars also known as "upri's" are known to keep the best for themselves. I know for certain ,the head upri lived one block from the jamatkhana and while khichra was being prepared in the morning for the evening iftar on 10th. moharram , big pots of khichra were being delivered to his home while vaez was going on.
so this fancy word khidmat guzar should change to "gujju ke chal". The upri's do it for only one motive , to get plenty of free food.

[bohra_manus]

Karachi khidmat gujars also known as "upri's" are known to keep the best for themselves. I know for certain ,the head upri lived one block from the jamatkhana and while khichra was being prepared in the morning for the evening iftar on 10th. moharram , big pots of khichra were being delivered to his home while vaez was going on.
so this fancy word khidmat guzar should change to "gujju ke chal". The upri's do it for only one motive , to get plenty of free food.

Brothers,
I would not paint all Khidmat guzars with a single stroke.
While there may be some bad apples in the basket, most are genuine; there to help to acquire sawab and khushi of their Moula (however misguided we may think they are). I have seen it and experienced it that some times they are left with minimal amount of food. Yes on occasions some show little favoritism to friends/family thaals but a huge majority are there to help out.
So please stop bashing all of them because of a few bad ones.

[humanbeing]

In my opinion, 5 % are bad apples, rest 95 % are genuine khidmatguzars. There are many kinds, from serving food to event management. They go through hardships, abuses and ridicule from general public yet they maintain commitment to the task allotted to them. Its admirable.

[Al Zulfiqar]

yes, there are a self-sacrificing few who serve out of a genuine intention to feed the public, even if they remain hungry. it has happened with me too on a couple of occasions.

but once again the question is why kaderbhai mansoos is not exhorting these thieves to protect themselves on 2 wheelers with the miraculous fmb dabbas which have been proven with so many mojizas? if any ordinary abde can walk away without a scratch because of these dabbas, then a devoted and loyal abde 'khidmatguzaar and ena azwaaz' should have even more divine protection?

think about this while the zinger takes deleterious effect on your nether regions.

[zinger]

Thank you Bohra Manus and Human Being for understanding what im trying to say.

Al Zulfiqar, glad to know that you are a khidmat guzaar. now i know why you hate us so much. being surrounded by rascals such as these all your life would disgust anyone for sure.

my post to you was because the way you wrote, you were showing all khidmat guzars in bad light.

the very fact that you have clarified and accepted that there are some who do it out of real sense of duty is reason enough for me to apologise.

if you clarifed that while there are certain khidmat guzars who do genuine work, but some villains will always be there, we would not be discussing this right now

i have in no way taken offence at what you wrote. i am not a khidmat guzaar, i fear, i am much to selfish, i cannot be noble like them. my anger was because you discounted those selfless many for a selfish few

[zinger]

Karachi khidmat gujars also known as "upri's" are known to keep the best for themselves. I know for certain ,the head upri lived one block from the jamatkhana and while khichra was being prepared in the morning for the evening iftar on 10th. moharram , big pots of khichra were being delivered to his home while vaez was going on.
so this fancy word khidmat guzar should change to "gujju ke chal". The upri's do it for only one motive , to get plenty of free food.

next time he does it, make sure you carry enough jamal ghota (ghoda julaab or anything that causes intense loose motions) and pour it down his dabbas.

this way, hopefully, he will not do it next time, thinking that he is being punished by Allah for his behuda sharmnak naapaak activities

[think]

these upri's that you call khidmat guzar and doing for khushi of moula is not so. These upris you will find dime a dozen at their favourite panwalla shop chewing tobbacco and spitting all over the place. These are uneducated jobless people and being upri is a social event for them and a chance to show a little pride. Get this out the door that they are there for morela's khushi. It is for their own khushi. because they have nothing else to do. 95% are sailing in the same boat.

[Al Zulfiqar]

zinger and others,

you have still not answered my question: if a mojiza ocurred wherein an ordinary abde carrying an fmb dabba on his bicycle suffered no harm when involved in an accident and walked away without a scratch, then why can't kaderbhai mansoos order all khidmatguzars ane ena azwaaz to do likewise?

it has been proven time and again on this thread as mentioned in various mojizas transmitted through sms' to all abdes worldwide, that fmb dabba has amazingly miraculous powers. why is kaderbhai mansoos now contradicting the capabilities of the dabba named after his revered father?

[Hozefa]

Please Can we have a good Message (reesala) for the Valentine's day, a much funnier that can go viral among bohras tomorrow
Thanks

[Bori85]

Recently got a new SMS, that in Raudat Tahera (Bhindi Bazar Roza) a board has been placed with lots of Names listed on it. These are names of both genders, and it's stated that these names are not correct Islamic name, so they should be changed. few of them are : Farzana, Najma, Kausar, Liyaqat,Zulfaqar, Anis,Sofi etc., there are around 55 names in the list. These are all 'Galat Names" and should be change now. So it seems that people with these names will have to get a new one from Kothar, now we have to see how are they going to implement this "new fatwa" of name change. Has anyone else received this SMS?

[Safiuddin]

Bori85,

There is no cause for concern. First, assuming the notice was placed by an non-Islamic cult entity, there can be no question of any
problem with names. Second, no other human or God on Earth has the right to change anyone's name. Finally, the notice was placed in
a place of regular grave worship of a tyrant and megalomaniac. Therefore, this "notice" has no relevance to anyone, except to one who
may have been buried in a gutter underneath the sign.

[SBM]

l

[Safiuddin]

How disgusting. I know many Bohris with these names, quite a few of them in their 70's and 80's.
So now they have to change their names because Burhanuddin and Ilk don't approve, right?
Because "Zohra" and "Asghar" and "Murtaza Ali" are wrong names?
Wake up people:
They tell you what names you can have,
tell you what to eat and when,
tell you what to sell in your shops,
tell you where to live,
tell you what to wear,
tell you who you can talk to,
tell you what Internet sites you are allowed to visit,
make you beat yourselves senseless, beat your children,
treat you like untouchables, make you bow down to humans,
make you perform shirk,
extort your money, and tell you to live a life of austerity
while they ride around in luxury cars and planes.
And that's the short list.
WHEN will you wake up?

[Bohra spring]

The best part is AZ has to change his name

My deceased grandfather will have to change his name , he will be issued with a new ruku chitti as his had ghalat name .....

What is not clear Asger is ok but not Asghar ?

[Safiuddin]

I've decided that the following names are ghalat, and must be changed immediately if not sooner.
For the convenience of any with such names, I have magnanimously provided my choice of alternate names:

1. Qaid Johar: Quincy, Janardan, Jarred; I will also accept Johnny, Joe, and Burt
2. Malek Al Ashtar: Madan Mohan, Maximillian, Maleka, Pedophile, Malek Al Miskeen; Kathy will also be accepted
3. Idris: Iblis
4. Taher: Kim Jong Il (No substitutions will be allowed)
5. Mufaddal: Manfield, Madhu, Marmaduke, Mutawalli; I will grudgingly accept Bhagwaan
6. Burhanuddin: Bartholomew, Imposter; I will also accept Bhagyawati

[Aymelek]

Please Can we have a good Message (reesala) for the Valentine's day, a much funnier that can go viral among bohras tomorrow
Thanks

This one is already in circulation today...So have a good lauf...

Premiyo ni jammaat..
Aa Mohabbat na Dino havey tamam Thai Che.!!
Aa hamna pichhla hafte, RoseDay hato, aney aajey aa kayo din aavi gayo??

Aa Dino kitni jaldi tamam Thai Gaya ..!!
Rose, chocolate khalawi, wadaao kida aney HUGwa pachhi Aaje Kiss no Mubarak din bhi havey tamam Thai Che..
Ghana mohabbat na karnaraao ye kisam kisam ni kisso Kari ne barakat lidij hasey.. Aney j baaqi hasey ye lai rayaa hasey.. Khuda ehni kisso ne IMRAN HASHMI ni hurmat se ghani lamdi karjo.. Aney haji b koi baqi hasey inshallah ye aje aa barakat lese..

Arrey koi mehroom na rehjo..!!
Aney aaje to LUV U LUV U no ajab Hangaam hasey..

Arey aje su thaase..
Aa me Kai zaban c bayan karu.. Arey aje to mohabbat na izhaar no ajab manzar hasey..
Aasmaan ma Laila-Majnoo ne kiss Kari rahya hase..
Romio-Juliat ne hugg Kari raya hasey ..
Aney apan yaha saglaa aa barakat lai ne apni mohabbat ne zinda karise..

Chalo-chalo-chalo..
Aa valetine na Mubarak Dino havey apna si wada Thai Che...
Aa umar no su bharoso..?? Aawte WARAS kon hasey kon nahi..

Areyyy aa barakat ne uthavi lo...
Pyar no izhaar Kari lo..
Hug kari lo...
Choomi lo..
Daee do..
Laee lo..
Aajna din ma uthte baithte 'I Luv U' ni TASBEEH Kari ne apni Girl Frndo/BoyFrndo ne khush Kari ne sawab hasil Kari lo..
Aaj na din ma
HEER-RANJHA na waseela se hr premiyo ne milwu naseeb Thai .. AMEEEEEN!!!!!


I would request admin to move this post to the Ligher Side forum...

[Safiuddin]

Baaaahhha Haaa haaaaaa! Love it! Love Karee Lo!

[JC]

Aaray Aa Tuo Upna Naseeb Ni Bulandi anany Mauala No Karam anay Ehsan Chay Kay Apna Aa Denno Naseeb Thaya Chay ... Aa Din Nee Sahee Maarafat Tuo Apnay Kareay Chay ....... Oala Loku tuo khalee kiss karay, galay lagay anany beeju kaee bhee karay ............ tey khalee dunya wastay chay, ahnay kaee sawab kay mutlab nahee, Apna Kiss Qabool, Apna Hugging Qabool, Apna Ezhar Qabool, Apnu Saglu Qabool ..........
Anay Ah Ah tamay Janoo Cho Aa Din Na Mansool Kuon Chay????!!!!!

[Bori85]

Aaray Aa Tuo Upna Naseeb Ni Bulandi anany Mauala No Karam anay Ehsan Chay Kay Apna Aa Denno Naseeb Thaya Chay ... Aa Din Nee Sahee Maarafat Tuo Apnay Kareay Chay ....... Oala Loku tuo khalee kiss karay, galay lagay anany beeju kaee bhee karay ............ tey khalee dunya wastay chay, ahnay kaee sawab kay mutlab nahee, Apna Kiss Qabool, Apna Hugging Qabool, Apna Ezhar Qabool, Apnu Saglu Qabool ..........
Anay Ah Ah tamay Janoo Cho Aa Din Na Mansool Kuon Chay????!!!!!

OMG! I am still laughing..... u guys have good sense of humour, I am sure the Zadaas with a bit of sense of humour must also be laughing after reading this.