Want To Marry A Bohri Girl From Gujarat

[Sheikh Rehab]

Hi,
I have reading this forum since many days, because i am kind of Situation and I need help.
I have seen people who are suggesting in this Forum are Really helpful and friendly. So i got courage to share my scenario and humble suggestion.

I am loving a girl from 3 years, and we do love each other alot. Our relationship has always been a pleasant and beautiful one. Since she is bhori, I respect her religion and view.
I respected her thoughts everytime, i never had in mind or attempted to do anything vulgar in relationship which other couple does. We have been very clean and trustworthy in our relationship.
Sometimes we felt bad because our religion differs, The much I have seen Here in Kuwait, My friends who are Bohri are very friendly with me and we share everything nicely. But When ever The Topic comes of Me and mine love, They Say I have to turn into Bohri.

I am sunni, and to Marry her I am Ready to turn into Bohri. We really Love each other. Neither Me, nor she can see each other going with someone else. We are really commited to each other in Love. Our Life will get Spoiled in this way. To make things easier I took the decision of becoming Bohri. I hope readers understand.

I want to Start a life with her.
I need suggestions from you all.

[Humsafar]

Welcome Sheikh. If you're ready to turn into a Bohra, then I don't see what the problem is. What have people not done for love? Becoming a bohra is a small price to pay. Go ahead and marry your love, and live happily, as they say, everafter.

[anajmi]

Sheikh,

I agree with Humsafar. We don't know what we have in store for us. But the bohras are muslims, albeit a bit off, but then who isn't. I was going to get engaged to a sunni girl a couple of decades ago, but her father asked me to recite the shahada in front of his "Sheikh", which I refused to do. I remained a bohri and look at me now.

[Humsafar]

I remained a bohri and look at me now.

God's ironies are infinite. Indeed, look at you now!

[Sheikh Rehab]

thank you for your humble reply.
yes Bohri, Sunni are Muslim. I believe Allah.
I know people have been very arrogant towards this discussion of Bohri and Sunni. But Living Among Bohri Friends, I really Dont See Difference between Me and them. We all just Normal Human. Have Lived Peacefully.

but Being Sunni Muslim and Turning in Bohri Could be a small Complication in the starting which is obvious. I do not Say I am Strict follower.

But could Someone Say me the Kind of Difficulty I might face in mindset ?

[Sheikh Rehab]

Sheikh,

but her father asked me to recite the shahada in front of his "Sheikh", which I refused to do.

Like what is the main problem ?
I really Do not Know anything about this.
Is there Something Wrong ?

Would you please share with me it would be very kind.

[Sheikh Rehab]

More to be Frank.
I am A Bit Scared to go near her dad and talk. But I know it would please him the decision which I am Taking to Turn into Bohri.
Could Someone give me Hint or suggestion.

I really need Some kind of Support. In Kuwait and Arab World We call it "Wasta" ...

Is the Bohri Religion Very Strict ?

I am not concern with the religion. The Only thing I want is to Marry Her ...

I want to Prove her Dad, If I am Ready To Do This much for her, to Marry her. I can be a good husband in Future. And I already Have Accomplishment in My life.

Will it be a problem in Marriage, if I say I am From Bangladesh and I want to turn Into If Its Necessary for Marriage ?

P.S: Her Father Knows Me from 3 years That I am in Love with her daughter. but it was the Custom. Which made him angry because I am not Bohri. But now I want to become Bohri to Marry Her. I repected him all the time. When ever he used to stand around me, I used to put my eyes down and go in my way.

[anajmi]

sheikh,

Being a bohra is far more difficult than being a Sunni muslim. You will be restricted in what you can and cannot do and how you can and cannot behave. If you go to the bohra mosque people will look at you like an alien. You should think about converting the girl instead. She will have a much easier time. However, her family's life will be made miserable by the kothari goons.

[ghulam muhammed]

bro sheikh,

Why do you want to put your iman at stake just for the sake of a marriage, the relationship of which is worldly. And I bet that you will never be able to become a true bohri because the reasons of you converting to bohraism is not that you have suddenly taken fancy for bohraism as your motive is worldly and not spiritual in nature.

[Sheikh Rehab]

When I was In America, I saw Bohri People. they Really Do not Look like that. They Were casual and get together with all type of people.
Their Lifestyle varies from Region to Region. I am not into Arguemental process. I just wanted to know about things.

I did not understand the term "kothari goons". Yes, Its likely with every religion. if Christian marries Muslim, Muslim Marries Hindu, Jew Marry Hindu. They are likely to face some kind of complication in the Beginning. But I feel The end its the Relation between Husband and Wife, Father and Daughter that matters. And Within Few Months It will get Relaxed. That Is how human nature.

And I really do not know what did you mean by "wordly relationship".

The Way a Child is attached to father, It isnt something called Wordly.
I respect all forms of Relationship.

Isnt It like at the end We All Follow Allah. Allah will Be the best in My heart in Any Form of Religion.

I do not want to start Some Arguement among members between Bohri and Sunni. My motive is Not that.

I am Really Committed To her, I cannot See her getting Married With Someone else, nor she can see me. She had bared alot to be with me.

I wish I wish i could make you all understand the feeling.

At the End of the its Me who will take care of Her, Feed her and Treat her With Respect and Dignity.

[porus]

She had bared [sic] a lot to be with me.

Please spare us the details.

This thread is a joke with everyone here turning into an agony aunt. I should have suspected it when this guy started calling himself Sheikh Rehab!

You know what? Get thee to a Rehab.

'First Love' between man and woman lasts only if it is thwarted and partners are separated. If you continue to be together, love will become a grind by the demands of life and transform into just a relationship, sometimes friendly and sometimes distressing; but never what it was when you first fell in love.

By the way, did you keep a fast of yawm al-mabath today like all Bohras? No? You have ways to go then.

This subject is not proper to this forum. I suggest "The Lighter Side" forum.

[SBM]

Br. Porus
I agree, there was a discussion on this subject some time back and the thread did not go anywhere. Sheikh Rehab can do a search on this forum and he can find the thread about Non Bohras marrying a Bohra.

[Fatwa Banker]

I am A Bit Scared to go near her dad and talk. When ever he used to stand around me, I used to put my eyes down and go in my way.

You must perform Sajda-e-darpokiya to her dad, and it will all be okay.

[Sheikh Rehab]

Br. Porus
I agree, there was a discussion on this subject some time back and the thread did not go anywhere. Sheikh Rehab can do a search on this forum and he can find the thread about Non Bohras marrying a Bohra.

Yes, I have read Some of them. Different people have Different Views.

[labbaikyaHussain]

bro sheikh,

Why do you want to put your iman at stake just for the sake of a marriage, the relationship of which is worldly. And I bet that you will never be able to become a true bohri because the reasons of you converting to bohraism is not that you have suddenly taken fancy for bohraism as your motive is worldly and not spiritual in nature.

+100...

I pity that girl who is marrying a hypocrite like you...you are changing your faith for a girl god knows what else u can change for some thing else in life.

shame

[candela]

thank you for your humble reply.
yes Bohri, Sunni are Muslim. I believe Allah.
I know people have been very arrogant towards this discussion of Bohri and Sunni. But Living Among Bohri Friends, I really Dont See Difference between Me and them. We all just Normal Human. Have Lived Peacefully

Isnt It like at the end We All Follow Allah. Allah will Be the best in My heart in Any Form of Religion.

From these comments I get that Sheikh Rehab is willing to switch faiths not because he's willy-nilly with faith, but because the idea of being in a specific sect or another doesn't bother him as it doesn't change/affect his devotion to Allah(swt).

Sheikh Rehab, I should say though that you should get a fuller glimpse of what the beliefs of the Bohras are, what the Syedna claims and what contentions people have with the sect, if you have not already done so... i.e. make sure you know what you're getting into. Peace brother...

[anajmi]

'First Love' between man and woman lasts only if it is thwarted and partners are separated. If you continue to be together, love will become a grind by the demands of life and transform into just a relationship, sometimes friendly and sometimes distressing; but never what it was when you first fell in love.

Unfortunately, this reality will never prevent people from falling in love and living through the fear of loosing the one they love. These are matters of the heart. Hind sight is always 20/20 etc etc.

[TBG]

AoA,
while we have heard one side of the story, can bro rehab elaborate on what are your parents thought? of course i am sure you and they realized that once you convert you will probably never celebrate eid on the same day. if you goto Haj together you will be completing arkans before they will, you will probably be fasting a day or two ahead of your parents, you will be cursing on the first three caliphs, and you will never share all the major religious days and nights ever again. i am sure you have had this discussion with your parents. Of course inshAllah when you have children you will need to explain why your parents are soooo different from your mother's parents. the list goes on.

i share with this with you from personal experience. its easier said than done .... like bro porus said .. love only stays a few days and after that once reality hits unless of course you dont care about religion at all

w salams

[labbaikyaHussain]

No sane man will ever think to join DB's unless and until it is a case like SR...who can keep faith of his forefather on stack.

any ways I advice you to do some research on SHIA(ithna ashari) faith and understand the concept of wilayate ahlul bayt before taking any decision.

[labbaikyaHussain]

thank you for your humble reply.
yes Bohri, Sunni are Muslim. I believe Allah.
I know people have been very arrogant towards this discussion of Bohri and Sunni. But Living Among Bohri Friends, I really Dont See Difference between Me and them. We all just Normal Human. Have Lived Peacefully

Isnt It like at the end We All Follow Allah. Allah will Be the best in My heart in Any Form of Religion.

From these comments I get that Sheikh Rehab is willing to switch faiths not because he's willy-nilly with faith, but because the idea of being in a specific sect or another doesn't bother him as it doesn't change/affect his devotion to Allah(swt).

Sheikh Rehab, I should say though that you should get a fuller glimpse of what the beliefs of the Bohras are, what the Syedna claims and what contentions people have with the sect, if you have not already done so... i.e. make sure you know what you're getting into. Peace brother...

We all know sunni getting in shia faith will definitely change/effect in the way he looks at Islaam.

[stranger]

You must perform Sajda-e-darpokiya to her dad, and it will all be okay.

You did the same, i believe. .

[Muslim First]

mustafanalwalla
i brough a Hindu girl into our fold so i kind of evened out the balance

That means she is Bohri!!!!!

mustafanalwalla
i go with them to the temple

So she is still Hindu
Does your Amil know you are going to temple?

[Muslim First]

Br TBG

It is easy to abandon or neglect man’s parents then women’s parents. World has change.

[Husain taher]

u dont know what are u r getting into..

DB's community is a lake full of Piranha..

dnt let your heart numb your senses..

As the old Indian saying goes:- Nari narg ka dwar hoti hai (women is the gate to hell)

Your well wisher

[SBM]

Yes she is now converted to Islam.
Yes, she still goes to the temple

If you or her joins in Puja at Temple then she and you are MUSHRIK/KAFIR and not MUSLIMS. Surprisingly that Ghayab na Maula does not about this.

[Husain taher]

Bizzare

If you father felt the same way about your mother, you wouldn't have been here, spouting garbage and shooting your mouth of like that.

my father didnt feel like that but surely your children will wen ur wife sings her morning bhajans.. And surely u will be performing pur josh matam after that..

And surely after that u will be calling urself DAWOODI BOHRA

[labbaikyaHussain]

To get back to the original topic, Sheikh Rehab, ignore us, we are here for a different purpose all together.

I hope that the two of you can work out an amicable solution with the families and get married and have a very, VERY happily married life.

God forbid, if not, then may Allah give you both the strength to move on with life.

From one love-struck person to another, i shall pray for you to succeed, in whatever path you take

Mustafa bhai,

I am really to say this,but if ur wife isnt muslim and u think just coz u both pray super power it makes her muslim then u are wrong, until ur wife recites sahada whole heartedly and stops praying to stones she is haraam on you.even your child is illigimite according to islaam if she had not accepted islaam.

[SBM]

Up yours OB
Nalwala's testosterone level jumping up
There is a VAST difference between visiting a temple and taking part in a puja.

and to all those Abdes who supported Nalwala need to tell us if Nalwala is still considered Mumin as per diktat of Dawat.
BTW one of my relative did merry a Hindu but she has become more of Abde then my other family members and she nor her husband visits temple or take part in any other non Muslim religious activities. Her parents have accepted her as Muslim/Mumin and do not ask her to join in any of their faith based program

[Humsafar]

Guys, please leave mustafanalwala alone and get off your high horses. There is nothing wrong if his wife still visits the temple and he accompanies her. In fact, in my eyes, he is a better human being for doing so. Remember, there is no compulsion in religion. And both of them prove, in a way, that the majority of us are born into a religion and do not acquire our beliefs through understanding or deliberation. Our beliefs are the product of brainwashing and habit. Both of them are doing what they have been taught to do. Most of us believe and do what we've been taught to believe and do. Only a few lucky ones are able to escape this conditioning.

[SBM]

Br. Humsafar
It is him who pointed one finger towards everyone before realizing that four fingers points towards him.
Even AZ had apologized to him calling him names but he did not learn not to lecture people about religion and morality. I agree there is no compulsion in Islam but as my Aaamil said to me, once you take Misaq, there is compulsion being in Dawat.